


Where the Ocean Meets the Sky

by The_Clock_Strikes_Twilight



Series: Celestial Songs [4]
Category: Kingdom Hearts (Video Games)
Genre: AkuSai Month 2020 (Kingdom Hearts), Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Celestial Songs, Hurt/Comfort, LeaIsa Month 2020 (Kingdom Hearts), Light Angst, M/M, Musical Prompt Playlist, Songfic, Songs of the Sun and Moon, there's a little bit of fluff but not a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:00:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25248829
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Clock_Strikes_Twilight/pseuds/The_Clock_Strikes_Twilight
Summary: It’s quiet. Aside from the crashing of the waves. Neither Axel nor Saïx knows what to say, though. It’s a miracle they both even agreed to be here. Alone. Together. Then again, they may as well be standing miles apart. Axel with his hands in his pockets. Saïx with his arms folded across his chest. Both their gazes are turned downward. They can’t bring themselves to look at the other. Because if they do, they know they’ll lose their internal struggles. If they do, they’ll fall apart completely.
Relationships: Isa & Lea (Kingdom Hearts), Isa/Lea (Kingdom Hearts)
Series: Celestial Songs [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820650
Kudos: 6





	Where the Ocean Meets the Sky

**Author's Note:**

> Song Used: "Only You" by Cheat Codes & Little Mix
> 
> July 13th, Day 7 of AkuSai/LeaIsa Month

_Dancing with your silhouette_

_In the places that we met_

_Oh, trying to find you in the moon_

_Paris never feels the same_

_When the streets all call your name_

_Oh, so I hide in crowded rooms…_

10p. Axel should consider this late, but it’s not. It’s still early. There’s still an entire night ahead of him. He stands on the small balcony of his apartment, leaning against the railing with a drink in his hand. The moon is full tonight. And it’s full of memories. Recollections he doesn’t want to think about. That’s why he’s drinking. In hopes of drowning out the days he doesn’t want to remember. Hmm…

Drinking alone isn’t any fun.

He grabs a jacket and leaves his apartment. The streets aren’t necessarily empty, but there aren’t many people out. There are more shadows than anything. More memories. All the places he’d spent with—

No. Axel isn’t supposed to be thinking about _him_. Then again, he was never supposed to meet him. Their introduction had been a fluke. A moment that never should happened. A moment he would go back in time and change if he could. Undo. If he had the chance to go back, he would’ve just walked away. He never would have let himself get entranced by those teal eyes.

He squeezes his eyes shut. Damn it. This shouldn’t be so difficult. He’s never had an issue with getting over someone before. _He_ was different, though. Which is, at the least, strange to say. Axel had barely known the guy. Tch. Except that’s a lie. Maybe they hadn’t known each other for long, but they had learned everything about each other. Memorised each other. Their connection had been palpable. Unlike anything Axel had ever felt before.

He shakes his head, stuffing his hands deep into his pockets. This isn’t helping. He stops and looks around, his eyes soon landing on a small club on the corner of the street. He beelines for the place. He needs another drink. A crowd. Noise. Anything to drown out his thoughts. Anything to make him forget. Even if it’s just temporary.

He gets the opposite result, though. The more he drinks, the worse he feels. The crowded room becomes overheated. The noise overwhelming. Everyone starts to look like _him_. The colours and the way they move. It all reminds Axel of exactly who he’s trying to escape. There is no escape. He’ll forever be haunted by that silhouette.

_All I’ll follow right down the river_

_Where the ocean meets the sky_

_To you, to you…_

The cool air hits him hard, leaving him breathless. He leans over himself for a few seconds as he tries to catch his breath. Man, he feels sick. The street is spinning. He takes a couple more deep breaths before he continues on his way. He really should go home, but that’s not the direction he’s heading in.

He soon finds himself at the beach. It’s empty. The contrast of the sound of the waves is so different than the loud music. Just as loud in a sense, especially at one o’clock in the morning, but so much better. So much more relaxing. Soothing.

He follows along the shore until he reaches the exact spot he had wanted to get to. _Their_ spot. Hmm. It’s just as empty as the rest of the beach. That was to be expected, but a little part of him had still been hoping…

The closest Axel will ever get to _him_ again is by looking at the moon.

_Once upon a time, we had it all_

_Somewhere down the line, we went and lost it_

_One brick at a time, we watched it fall_

_I’m broken here tonight and, darling, no one else can fix me_

_Only you, only you_

_And no one else can fix me_

_Only you, only you, only you_

_And no one else can fix me_

_Only you, oh…_

He’s not sure exactly how much time he wastes at that spot. Long enough for the moon to disappear and the light of the sun to take over the sky. Too long.

Axel finally decides to make his way back to his apartment. Now that the alcohol has worn off and his head is pounding, he figured no better time. Not that he wants to be alone in an empty apartment. There’s no one else he’d want to have over other than—

Sometimes he fools himself into thinking that he’ll get back to his apartment to find _him_ waiting there. That they’ll be able to sit down and talk and move past whatever it was that had torn them apart. That they’ll be able to fall back in love. Not that Axel ever fall out of love. Hell, he still doesn’t understand exactly what had happened. He just knows that there’s no fixing it. There’s no making any of this better. It’ll never be better. There’s no way… Not unless they can be together again.

As soon as he’s home, he jumps in the shower. Washes the club off him. Washes the beach off him. Watches as last night runs down the drain. And once he steps out, he grabs his phone. Axel searches his contacts until he comes across the name that he so desperately wishes would flash on the screen again. Except he knows it never will. Just like he knows that’ll never change.

He takes a deep breath as he opens the contact information. Then he holds his breath as he deletes it.

There’s no going back. No changing to who he had been before. He’ll have to live with this version of himself now. This half-complete version. Maybe he’ll rediscover himself along the way, but—

_Only you…_

His phone rings. He looks at the screen. At the number flashing across the screen. There’s no name attached, but he sure as hell has that number memorised. He must be dreaming, though. Hallucinating. There’s no way…

He answers the call. “Saïx?”

_Did I let go of your hand_

_For a castle made of sand_

_Oh, that fell into the blue_

_I went following the sun_

_To be alone with everyone_

_Oh, looking round a crowded room…_

When Saïx signed up for this abroad programme, he knew it would change his life, but he hadn’t expected it to change in the way it had. He hadn’t expected to meet and fall in love with someone. That’s exactly what happened, though. And now—

Now he spends every chance he has in bed. He never wants to get up. He doesn’t want to do anything. Participate in any activities. Not unless he has to. Today he doesn’t have to. Today he could feasibly stay in bed. Do nothing. And he should, considering how terribly he’s been sleeping. It’s 10a, though, and he’s wide awake. Restless.

He slips out of bed and finds his way into the shower. Maybe some hot water will help to alleviate the pain. The fatigue. The reminiscences. Maybe they’ll all wash down the drain and he’ll come out a new person. A better person. It doesn’t work that way, though. He wishes it could be that simple, but nothing worth it is ever simple to obtain. Yet, it’s always easy to lose.

By the time he grows weary of his empty apartment, it’s one o’clock in the afternoon. He can’t spend another moment here. Not with the way the shadows are dancing along the walls. It’s too familiar. Too exhausting. So, he grabs his jacket and leaves the apartment behind. Leaves the loneliness behind. Leaves the night behind.

The sun is high in the sky. Even so, there’s a certain chill to the air. A crispness. Saïx pulls his jacket a bit tighter around himself and starts his way down the crowded street. He weaves in and out of all the strangers he passes. He minds his own business. Focusing on his feet and the next step he’ll be taking. The sun is too blinding to keep his head up. Just like a certain redhead—

He stops dead in his tracks. No. This isn’t what he should be thinking about. He shouldn’t be thinking about _him_. It’s not fair. It’s not fair that he’s struggling to hold on while the other has already let go.

He practically stumbles into the nearest café. It’s full of people, yet none of them seem to notice his entrance. To notice him. That’s okay. He doesn’t need to be noticed. He needs to be blend in. So, he looks around for an empty seat only to now find a sea of green eyes staring at him. His heart stops in his chest. A colour that once was his favourite, but now will only ever haunt him.

_And I’ll follow right down the river_

_Where the ocean meets the sky_

_To you, to you…_

The café had been a bad idea, which is why Saïx left it in favour of the beach. It’s just as crowded, but he doesn’t mind. He wants to be lost. Except he knows exactly where he’s going. Where his feet are leading him. Down the shore and to the spot that once belonged to _them_. The spot they could always have to themselves. A spot no one else seemed to be aware of.

This is another bad idea. He shouldn’t go there. He knows he shouldn’t. He can’t seem to stop his feet, though; it’s like they have a mind of their own. Hmm. So maybe it won’t be such a terrible idea, after all.

A little part of him is almost disappointed when he discovers that the spot is empty. He thought maybe—No. Only he would torture himself with coming back here. The other would never…

The closest Saïx will ever get to _him_ again is by looking at the sun.

_Once upon a time, we had it all_

_(We had it all)_

_Somewhere down the line, we went and lost it_

_(We went and lost it)_

_One brick at a time, we watched it fall_

_I’m broken here tonight and, darling, no one else can fix me_

_Only you, only you_

_Oh, no one else can fix me_

_Only you, only you, only you_

_(Nobody else)_

_And no one else can fix me_

_Only you, oh…_

He stays long enough to watch the sunset. To watch the sun as it disappears beyond the horizon. He stays until the vibrant colours all fade to nothing more than grey.

He reluctantly makes his way back to his apartment. He doesn’t want to be surrounded by empty walls, but he has nowhere else to go. Nothing else to do. And he’s exhausted. Maybe he’ll be able to pass out as soon as he steps through the front door.

Wishful thinking. The cool air from the walk only woke him up. So instead of bothering to even try and sleep, he brews a pot of coffee. Once he has a cup for himself poured, he curls up on the couch. He sits in silence. Looking around the apartment. At all the spots he had once stood with—

Damn it. Why is he still thinking about _him_? He should be over it by now. He should have been able to move on already. That’s all he wants, after all.

Except that’s a lie. Saïx doesn’t want to have to move on. He wants to be able to see the other again. To have those green eyes on him. To run his fingers through that red mane. He closes his eyes at the thought. Loses himself in it. He lets out a heavy sigh, forcing his eyes open. This is all too much. Too difficult.

He sets the coffee cup down on the end table and lies across the couch, draping his arm over his closed eyes. He needs to sleep. Needs to not think about anything for a few hours. He needs to lose himself so he can find himself all over again. And maybe he’ll start with dreaming. Maybe…

_Only you…_

He awakes with a start. With his phone in his hand. He’s called someone. Shit. He actually dialed a number in his sleep. His subconscious mind got the better of him. And he almost can’t believe the name of the contact on his screen. He really should just hang up, but—

He swallows hard. “Axel.”

_Falling, falling, yeah…_

It’s quiet. Aside from the crashing of the waves. Neither Axel nor Saïx knows what to say, though. It’s a miracle they both even agreed to be here. Alone. Together. Then again, they may as well be standing miles apart. Axel with his hands in his pockets. Saïx with his arms folded across his chest. Both their gazes are turned downward. They can’t bring themselves to look at the other. Because if they do, they know they’ll lose their internal struggles. If they do, they’ll fall apart completely.

_Only you, only you_

_Only you, only you_

_And no one else can fix me_

_Only you_

_(Only you)_

_Only you_

_(Only you)_

_Only you_

_(Only you)_

_And no one else can fix me_

_Only you_

“What are we doing here?” Axel speaks up, unable to take the silence any longer. “What was the point of coming here if we’re just gonna—? If we’re not gonna talk?” He shakes his head. “I can’t waste more time with—”

“I called you in my sleep,” Saïx says. “It was an accident, but I wasn’t just going to hang up on you.”

“In…your sleep…?” He pauses. “Right. Okay. So, it’s not like you actually _wanted_ to see me, yeah? Is that what you’re saying?”

“I must’ve subconsciously wanted to.”

He considers this for a moment. “What does that mean, then? For us?”

Saïx shrugs his shoulders. “I—I’m not sure…” He hasn’t thought this through. He hasn’t had time to. “I mean, I thought we agreed—”

“I don’t care what we agreed on.” Axel takes a couple steps closer to the other. “I fell hard and fast for you. And I’m not sure I’m ready to give that up yet.”

“What happens after the programme, though? We’ll go our separate ways and never see or hear from each other again.”

“It doesn’t have to be that way. It doesn’t have to end that way. We could still at least try and make it work.”

“I’m not sure it’ll be that simple.”

“Then let’s not think about the end.” He closes the distance between them. “Let’s just be together now while we’re able.” He takes Saïx’s hands in his own. “Let’s take it day-by-day, and then we’ll figure out the rest later. Because I can’t bear the idea of not being with you for the rest of this trip. I’ve been losing my mind since our last talk. Regretting ever coming to that conclusion because it’s dumb. And you can’t tell me I’m wrong.”

Saïx keeps his hands still, but he still won’t look at the other. “This isn’t a good idea. We’ll both be left heartbroken in the end.”

“Better both of us than just one of us.”

He can’t help but chuckle at this. “What an odd way of putting it.”

He smiles a bit sheepishly. “Then you’ll love this next one.” He cups Saïx’s chin with two fingers and gently lifts it to finally force him to meet his gaze. “If anyone were to break my heart, I would want it to be you.”

Saïx doesn’t know how to respond to that. Axel doesn’t give him the chance to respond. He closes the distance between them by bringing their lips together. Saïx doesn’t protest. He loses himself in the kiss. In the redhead’s warmth. In the way his arms wrap around his body. Saïx wraps his arms around the other’s neck in return. _I fell hard and fast for you_. Saïx can’t deny he doesn’t feel the same. _If anyone were to break my heart, I would want it to be you_. That shouldn’t sound as appealing as it does. Hmm…

Heartbreak or not, maybe every moment like this will still be worth it. Besides, it’s like the redhead said, they can figure out the rest later. Along the way. For now, he just wants to be with Axel. And he knows Axel wants to be with him, too. And maybe that’s all they need. Maybe that’s more than enough.

**Author's Note:**

> Follow the event on twitter and tumblr using #CelestialSongs
> 
> twitter: @/LadySage08  
> tumblr: the-clock-strikes-twilight


End file.
